A WARNING TO LONELY WOMEN!
I am coming due my annual checkup in a couple of months, which just happens to be around my birthday. I can’t say I am dreading the birthday but am dreading the checkup…I have not quite kept up with my diet I started at the beginning of the year which means I am sort of back where I started on the 1st of the year. That is somewhat discouraging. I guess I will just have to start over, again.
There are several things I have to do to improve my quality of life. Get healthy, get fit, and now according to the article below I need to solve this lonely problem….heart problems run in my family and I do not want to be one of the statistics. I have people in my life, kids, family, friends – personal & acquaintances and co-workers but as the article states you can be lonely with people around you and sometimes I am. I often say "Jesus has to be enough" but what if sometimes He is not? How do you get there? I am assuming that this is the journey, the growing we do. Getting to a place where He is our all. Most days I do believe that He is enough, every once in a while there is a familiar pang in my heart….loneliness.
I know I am not alone in feeling this.
There are thousands of people walking around, on this rock, who are feeling the same emotion at the same time. And we are walking among each other. Kind of ironic, isn’t it, that we would be lonely in a group of people who might be lonely too? How is that? At this moment I am thinking of a line from the movie, "Martian Child" which is based on a true story. John Cusak is in the car driving with Dennis, the child he is considering adopting. The child thinks he is from Mars. He says to the child after becoming somewhat frustrated with him constantly believing he is Martian, "Dennis, can I just say one last thing about Mars? – which may be strange coming from a Science-Fiction writer – But right now, you and me here, put together entirely of atoms, sitting on this round rock with a core of liquid iron, held down by this force that seems to trouble you, called gravity, all the while spinning around the sun at 67,000 miles an hour and whizzing through the Milky Way at 600,000 miles an hour in a universe that very well may be chasing its own tail at the speed of light; And amidst all this frantic activity, fully cognizant of our own eminent demise – which is our own pretty way of saying we all know we’re gonna die – We reach out to one another. Sometimes for the sake of entity, sometimes for reasons you’re not old enough to understand yet, but a lot of the time we just reach out and expect nothing in return. Isn’t that strange? Isn’t that weird? Isn’t that weird enough? The heck do ya need to be from Mars for?"
That line runs through my head a lot. I think because there is something mind boggling about the whole statement. The part that really kind of sticks out for me is that he says "we reach out and expect nothing in return" I am not so sure that is true. If we were being truthful with ourselves we do expect something when reaching out. Don’t we? Maybe satisfaction, comfort, validation, acceptance and attention. I am not so sure. I think that depends largely upon how we grew up. For example the child in the movie was severely neglected and abandoned. He escaped his horror by thinking he was from another planet. He was not expecting anything when David came into his life. Maybe he was, he expected to be abandoned again. Someone might quote Skinner here, right?
Personally, I think that this is how Jesus changes us. How He changed me. He came and filled my life, filled my heart and continues to today if I continually allow it. He has not rejected me, He accepts me. He can satisfy. He can comfort. He can validate. He gives me personal attention each day. I expect that when Jesus fills my heart with love, it overflows. It spills out onto others, thereby giving them what they don’t expect. The woman at the well did not expect anything. In fact she was shocked that this man, a Jew, would even be speaking to her. God wants to put His love into all of us, if we will allow it. When I am thirsty I just need to drink. When I become lonely I just need to be filled up by Him. I am guilty of not allowing this on occasion, though I am still learning.
For those of you who do not have the Lord in your life, God has placed a hole in your heart. A hole that only He can fill. Invite the Lord into your life.
When I first read the article below, I have to admit there was some fear welling up in me. My first thought was how do I deal with that? I have been feeling that for years now. My heart hurts sometimes. I don’t know if it is physical or psychological. I do know that my Lord gives me peace when I pray. I also know that I am not where I need to be fitness wise. So maybe God is using this article as a warning to me. "Michelle, stop procrastinating, start taking some action. Do what you know you are suppose to do and I will take care of the rest. I will take care of the loneliness, I promise." It makes me smile that the Lord is so personal like this. He knows I worry about my health and He knows that I worry about my heart, because heart problems run in my family. So He leads me and guides me. He fills me….
Grace to you all, be healthy
Feeling lonely is hard on a woman’s arteries
New study shows a pained heart may lead to actual heart damage
For some women, a lonely heart may lead to actual heart damage.
A new study has linked feeling forlorn to a nearly 80 percent increase in the risk of heart disease — but only in women.
studies have shown that depressed and socially isolated people are at a
greater risk for developing heart disease, said the study’s lead author
Rebecca C. Thurston, an assistant professor of psychiatry and
epidemiology at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine. Both
of these factors can lead to stress, which can ultimately lead to heart
disease. But in a new study published in Psychosomatic Medicine, Thurston found the loneliness link even after accounting for the women’s level of depression and sociability.
Thurston wanted to focus on loneliness because it’s an especially negative and distressing emotion that many people experience.
was particularly intrigued by the documented findings that people can
feel lonely despite having many people in their lives,” she said.
“When it comes to loneliness, it’s not just how many friends you have,
but also how supported you feel. You can have a lot of people around
you and still feel lonely.”
People feel lonely when they don’t have a sense of connectedness with their friends and families, experts say.
is related to how fulfilled we feel in our relationships,” said Brooke
Aggarwal, a researcher in preventive cardiology at Columbia University
Medical Center/New York-Presbyterian Hospital. “We experience feelings
of loneliness when we feel that what we’re getting from our
relationships falls short of what we expect.”
Thurston and a colleague from the Harvard
School of Public Health scrutinized 19 years of data from more than
3,000 men and women collected as part of a major ongoing health and
the beginning of the survey period, everyone had a comprehensive
physical examination and an extensive in-person interview that included
questions about loneliness. In the years that followed, the researchers
tracked heart health in the participants.
looked back over the years and found that the loneliest women at the
start ended up 76 percent more likely than the other women to develop
She suspects that the link showed up only in
women because they tend to be more concerned about relationship quality
than men. Women also tend to be more distressed when relationships with
spouses and friends aren’t as close as they hoped, she said.
new findings fall in line with other research showing that while any
type of marriage can protect a man’s heart, a bad marriage can be
harmful for a woman’s health, Thurston said.
Aggarwal said she hopes the new study may remind physicians to consider mental and emotional health when they evaluate and treat patients for heart disease risk.