sunset Pictures, Images and Photos
I do not know how to describe what has come into my life of late.  A cloud, I suppose.  Not a black one but somewhat gray.  Some around me here have suggested depression, I felt that it was more a quietness, lost in thought.   I believe it started out as a quietness but now has turned into a battle of hope & fear.  It comes subtly with no announcement.  Although I have been to this familiar place something is somewhat different.  The difference is I can not give up hope.  I can not quit believing that God is on the throne.  The Holy Spirit won’t let me.  Which keeps the fear at bay…but ever present.  I am very grateful for the fact the Holy Spirit won’t let me give in to the fear otherwise I would lay down and hide away. 

The fear, I believe, is coming from a mixture of thoughts going through my head….my relationship with God, my children, my finances, my home, my future, it all is swirling around trying to fit together.  I admit I have not been in the word as much as I usually am but there have been scriptures that come to mind I dwell on. Perhaps that is the key. Thoughts swirling around because there is no “glue” to hold them together.  The glue being God’s Word.  I know better and no one needs tell me that. 

So much death in the news….perhaps without Christ. My own sister who passed 3 years ago in September of a drug overdose. …missing her and sick of hearing about the drug abuse in our country and in my own family.  Missing the married life, while others are giving up on theirs.  Disappointments in others, inadequacies of my own and an unknown future of our changing nation.  It just goes on and on…nothing seems to come into focus.  It is much like a slide show that everyone is making these days…slide in, wipe, flip, spiral, dissolve…all to the sound track of “While I’m Waiting” by John Waller. 

I believe this is why it is so important to hide the word in your heart, for times like these. 

I don’t want pity or sympathy, I want to step through a door to new possibilities.  I have been praying for God to open some of those doors for me.  For opportunities to see a new thing in my life. I desire that…maybe that is what this time in my life is for to make me thirsty for the new thing….. I want to be the tree planted by the waters, spreading my roots, not fearing the heat of life and is always green; not to worry about the drought and never failing to bear fruit… God’s word says that this is what you will be if you trust and have confidence in HIM!!!

So I wait, gray cloud or not.  There are tears and smiles.  There is bittersweet.  There is anticipation.  There is fear.  There is hope.

13 thoughts on “FEAR NOT THE HEAT

  1. Michelle I think we all go through this from time to time and most are afraid to talk about it for fear of pity or judgment by others. I certainly have and it was one instance much as the one you describe that brought me back to Him several years ago. Trust in him and he will provide. I am living proof.

  2. There is that: hope. And our hope is not a "hope so" hope but, rather, a "know so" hope. That said, here\’s what God says: Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. Isaiah 43:19Only thing is, God\’s perception of time (being Infinite as He is) is worlds apart from our perception of time (being finite as we are). A day is as a thousand years with the Lord and a thousand years as a day (2 Peter 3:8). He is not in a hurry. He takes His time doing every little thing He does and sees to it that there are no shortcuts. He gets it done right the first time, and His work is perfect, and glorious, and everlasting. So, please, my friend and much-loved sister in Christ, be gentle with yourself. His gentleness is making you great.Much love,Carol 🙂

  3. … for your brethran suffer the same. I know as I too have felt this gray cloud and walk where you walk. I have fears, yet I don\’t fear. God certainly is the glue! Thank you Michelle! God will open those doors, for new opportunities, growth and service. Father, we praise you for the hope, joy and faith you have given us. In Jesus\’ name. Amen. |“““““““““““““““““““““““““““““||_|****** Flower Delivery*…….|“|““__|________________ _ | |_|___|)!(@)“(@)““““**!(@)(@)***!(@)““A friendship bouquet for a sweet friend!____________{@}__________________{@}_*_{@}___________{@}_*_{@}_*_{@_______:_*__{ @}_*_{@}_*_:______{@}_*_{@}_*_{@}_*_{@}____*_;_*_;__{@}__;_*_;__*____ ______\\\\_\\\\_\\\\_/__/_______________ __\\\\_\\\\__/_/_______________`\\\\_\\\\_/_/________

  4. I believe that I have an idea of the place that your are in….something like a stranger in a strange land. When I worked for my church and felt something like a depression was coming on, Fr. Tom would say, "Good for you!! Your life is preparing for a new direction.I myself seem to be off base today, starting last night. Today is my dad\’s birthday and he passed away 2 years ago August. Funny that I was not really thinking about the date, but he sort of came to me last night. Maybe it had something to to with my visit from Gail. As she and I were saying goodby I told her a story about my granddaughter that ended with my father\’s last words to me and I began to cry out of nowhere. I then later realized that I never cried about my father to anyone in person.I will join God\’s Girl in walking with you on your spititual journey.Eileen

  5. There are a lot of things and they are for all people. Today this, tomorrow that. Today to you, tomorrow to me. There is an amazing circle in life and I think it is God\’s will.Thanks for stopping by Shell. Have a great independence weekend, love, Zeynep xx

  6. hi shell, I relate to a lot of what you say. I agree it is so important to keep god\’s word written in our hearts. I have been away from home for a few days, staying at my brother and sister in laws and the lord has been showing me things, bringing realisation, I have also been close to his creation and artwork in the countryside and it has been awesome. take care, hugs – nita.

  7. Hello my dear friend~I have been to a place similar to yours~that grey place in life that started with a breakdown of my marriage, the imprisionment of my x husband for internet \’child porn\’ and then an eating disorder to top it off. I am a Bretheran, A Christian, and proud to say God has helped me through more than I could possibly ask for. Have faith my dear friend~you will feel better~love and blessings~Melanie xxxx~

  8. Michelle! I ordered that movie you recommended a while back: The Heart Of Texas. Just got it in the mail today and watched it a little bit ago, and all I can say is…W.o.W!!!

  9. Good morning Michelle…I hung out at your space for awhile this morning. Enjoyed the pictures. Good job mom!!! You have a little wonderful legacy there don’t ya know…In our live we know that we all have a purpose from God. For most of us that purpose is all the little things that we do. Some of the most important words that ever came up from my heart (I believe they were my spirit hearing from God)… “Just do what you can do for me today and let me handle the rest.”One of the biggest revelations for any of us believers is to have the goal to be and think like our God. He cherishes so many little things that make Him happy. Sometimes we can get in a mode of thinking that we always need to do something big and fantastic all the time. Not really, a lot of little things add up to something really special.You have probably heard me say before, “as parents we are all called to the ministry, our families.”So this morning, this may sound a bit silly, but I saw your cloud as protection from that heat in Houston. Yep…Shelter with a cooling mist. Maybe…a vision change.You all be well down there…Greg

  10. God is dealing with you huh; you don\’t know it maybe,but you are going through a spiritual journey; remember, if he brings you to it; he will bring you through it;—- I need to follow my own advice,as my faith is really being tested right now; with the death of my mom 3 yrs ago from colon cancer; and now today I FIND OUT my husband has a growth on his colon cancerous ; MY daugther is addicted to pain pills,etc ,etc ,etc. I PRAY GOD HELP ME HOLD ON,-AS I PRAY THE SAME FOR YOU MY FRIEND; GOD BLESS;

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