A-L-O-N-E Spells Fruit, or so I am told….

Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. John 12:24


Life is so very fragile.  One minute you are enjoying a moment and then the next your crying out to God in anguish.  What makes life so filled with wonder or doubt?  You can look at a newborn and see the intricacies of creation or pictures of the planets and stars in outer space, the never-ending vastness of it all.  Every direction we look we see what the Creator has bestowed upon the earth.

From the moment He placed Adam in the garden to have dominion over and to care for His creation there was a divine plan set out before man.  Adam did not have the ability to see forward into time and know what mankind would be capable of, nor did he know that death would soon enter into his conscience. Have you ever thought of what it must have been like for Adam before there was Eve?  Did he feel his aloneness?  While there was God, his Creator, his Fellowship, his Companion, his Teacher, his Giver, he was for all intent and purpose, utterly alone.  God, himself, acknowledged that Adam was alone because He said, “It is not good that man should be alone…”


An ominous word to some.  I have been wrestling with it again lately.  Wrestling inwardly.  I am not sure why.  Oh, I could come up with a few sound reasons but I always see someone else worse off than I so when I say them out loud they fall to the ground with a thud.  I sense something out of balance or something perhaps nagging at me.  I can not put my finger on it.  At first, I thought it was fear, fear of the unknown. Being a single parent, the health and well being of my children, salvation of friends and family, my financial future, my church’s search for a new pastor, the direction of our country, my prayer list, all this overwhelming me at times. My mind tells me that God is not the author of fear and I must rebuke it in the name of Jesus. Which I do.  But the nagging sensation will not leave.

A couple of Sunday’s ago a man, who is a missionary from our church, was preaching and he made a comment before his sermon, “The Lord has me in a holding pattern.”  I listened to his sermon which was much needed and very encouraging, however, it was that comment I kept coming back to.  And even now after several weeks, that remark has been rolling around in my head.  That is it, I have been in a “holding pattern” so to speak, for going on 1 year or more, now. And frankly, I am soooo ready to bust out….

A holding pattern.  I have described it to some as being stuck in mud up to my neck.  I can’t move one way or another.  I still have my senses about me but physically I can’t move left, right, forward or backward.  When I started to realize that back in September 2007, I resisted.  Became frustrated and cried.  Begged God to let me go.  Then I realized it was of no use…so I resigned to it.  The energy it took to resist was draining.


But then God nudged me…”I don’t want your resignation, I want your submission.”  Oh, my goodness, what else could I possibly submit.  I have lost soooo much (this is in my head) and then you know what He said to me in my spirit?  “To die is gain” Gain what, I ask, more mud?  I am stuck in the mud and have no way to….and before I could finish that thought, God says again “Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit.”

Ok, Ok already I get it…the choice is….stay standing, resist and be A-L-O-N-E or fall to the ground (stuck in the mud), die (to self, submit), bear fruit.

Stuck, slowly dying…guess I will see you in the spring when my fruit starts growing.  I sure hope it is sweet!!!!!


God is good, all the time!!!

Grace to you


8 thoughts on “A-L-O-N-E Spells Fruit, or so I am told….

  1. hi shell, very deep and well said, when I read your words, I saw lots of planes (in holding pattern) in my minds eye, all waiting to land, I was one of them. I have a variety of feelings going on at the moment, maybe the lord is telling me I am fighting too hard to stand. submit and fall to the ground, somewhat frightening thought, but if it is to the lord I am submitting ……..so be it and to bear fruit would be so so good – especially sweet fruit – take care god bless you – hugs nita.

  2. hi shell, thank you for your prayers, your visit, and your encouragement, I do appreciate your fellowship and friendship here on live spaces – I sometimes feel at the moment as if I am living in my computer, even my daughter and I seem to speak to each other through it. it is a special kind of alone I feel sometimes find it hard to explain, but think perhaps you understand what I mean. I belong to a very warm fellowship and of course have my family, but I guess it is the spiritual battle and trying to stand on my own two feet, that brings that aloneness – I feel better for the realisation of this and for giving it over  to the lord. god bless you shell, my prayers are with you too, I sense the battles you have had, and still have and you are a shining example of god\’s power within you – hugs – nita. p.s. the habakkuk scripture is one of my favourites, btw

  3. Perhaps the \’Holding Patter\’ sermon was the message to the missionary who was speaking, but it does not sound like our Holy Father wants us in a holding patten at anytime when we are confident in His promise and grace to sustain us.  From reading your post, I had the overwhelming sensation that God wanted you in a \’time out\’ situation for as long as He deems you are overly burdened by the matters of this world.  We are all victim to the tremendous power of Satan has on our lives, but mostly in our emotional stability.  Satan knows that you feel overwhelmed by the trials of life during these times of frantic, mind churning, random and fleeting thoughts from one burden to another.  This is when he has a perfect opportunity to strike us with the deception of the many human emotions he can use to gain a foothold amid our confusions.  Consider that God does not want you to ever be in a holding pattern, but rather a faithful pattern of trusting Him more than the burdens of life can cause you to sink to despair.  He wants to LIFT YOU UP!!….to have you be aware of the deceptive powers of the evil one, yet turn to Him for comfort and the magnitude of His love for you.  We know He will never give us more than we can bear.  He will never forsake us although we might forsake Him.  Trust the faith you profess.  Continue on the narrow road filled with grief, deep valleys, high and dangerous mountains, full of of others calling us fools for trusting in what we can\’t physically see or tenderly touch.  Our road to paradise is much more difficult than climbing Mount Everest or swimming around the world with no rest.  Our burdens are many, our sacrifices are great and our faith is the only pure force that can fuel our bodies and minds to never give up.  Our God offers us relief from worry and sufficient is His grace and love to weather any storm.  No, we don\’t have the answers immediately when needed the most, but we do have a path to Him through His son and our savior Jesus Christ.  All He expects from us is to trust in Him and do the very best we can with whatever life\’s circumstances we find ourselves in.  To whom He has given much He expects much, to whom he has given little He expects what little we have to give for His name\’s sake.  This earthy life prepares us to expect hardships and grief, tears of joy and laughter when happy.  Shell, you know His grace is sufficient to see you through this maze of emotions and physical weakness.  Gaze at those beautiful children He has given you and smile a contented smile.  One day at a time my friend.  One day at a time.

  4. I enjoyed your post. Thank you for stopping by and for your comment on the album. You have a very nice blog!
    Your Brother In Christ,

  5. shell, my dear friend and sister in christ – you are in my thoughts and prayers, I can imagine how you are feeling this weekend, not know complety of course, but our lord knows and I know you know that, take comfort in him, love nita

  6. Shell, you know you will never be alone.  I miss your visits and can\’t help but be concerned about you in this low time of your life.  Never forget, He is always listening and watching His beloved children who have suffered for him, and I\’ve found He is the Perfect conduit to share my feelings.  Listen to Amazing Grace being sung in Cherokee on my space, and no matter the language, the grace is always sufficient.


    Good afternoon C…
    Those words at the end of my entry are from Proverbs eight.
    I hear what you are saying by your comments to my entry. No matter what the circumstances we weigh it all compared to God’s Word.
    This is a time of discernment. Heart discernment. For those who are “truly” led by God’s Spirit will see the truth’s and see the lies. It is almost too obvious. Times are changing. Religious thinking will not even get in the way.
    Thanks for sending some sunny weather up this way.
    I’ve never like those alone feeling times. But as time has gone by over the last few years. Those alone times are now becoming few and far between no matter who may not be around me. Our God is so awesome.
    Have a super duper resurrection weekend,

  8. I really do not how you do it Shell.  You have such a busy family life and a single Mom.  The fact that you keep holding on your faith and share it to others whether you struggle makes Christ smile!  It is easy to be a Christian when you have lots of time and few challenges.  When you have problems and you still Praise God…there is the best faith out there!  Bless you this Easter

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